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Sunday, May 22, 2022

Do’s That Ruin Relationships

The beautiful feeling of being in the right relationship where one is treated deservingly brings a soothing balm to the heart. A right relationship is not the one void of misunderstandings; it’s sticking together no matter the misunderstandings.

The decision by both partners to make ‘break-up’ an exception in resolving misunderstandings makes the relationship to stand the test of time. There are some little “do’s” we do that are wrong; if they persist can ruin our relationships. They include:

1. Fishy texts.

Fishy text messages has caused the break-up of many relationships. People are different, the same way fingers are not equal. Your partner may see a fishy text like “My baby, I’m missing you” sent to an opposite sex and break-up with you without seeing reasons with you.

It’s not like they never loved you; they just can’t accommodate any thing that would make them doubt you and drain their peace of mind. Overhaul your chats and stop texting fishy text messages to the opposite sex.

2. Exaggerating “he knows he or she made me upset and yet didn’t apologize”.

Always communicate with your partner whenever they make you angry; this should be done with love and politeness. Do not assume your partner is aware that you’re upset via your mood swings. Express your anger politely and lovingly. Tell your partner his or her wrongs in a nice manner. Communicating his or her wrong in a rude and disrespectful manner is not the best way to resolving the issue.

3. Not saying “I’m sorry”.

Our ego is one factor that’s competing with the success of our relationships. Your unwillingness to say “I’m sorry” automatically says “I value my ego more than this relationship”. It’s your choice; your ego or your relationship?

4. Your partner is not a piece of cake.

He or she loves you so much; it’s so transparent you could see it. Don’t just feel loved by the sweet words, it must reflect in their actions and inactions. And when you could see and feel that, never take it for granted. Respect the fact they express their love towards you and reciprocate it.

5. The nonchalant attitude.

Love alone does not make a relationship work! The decision to be committed to each other despite the sourness and sweetness the relationship brings is the recipe to a long lasting sweet relationship.

When every effort to make the relationship work is one sided, the relationship is at the peak of its dissolvent. Most times, when your partner has complained concerning your actions and inactions; and you don’t want to change, they resolve to a nonchalant attitude.

Ask your partner the reasons for his/her attitude and resolve it lovingly. But if your partner has refused to communicate his or her reason, take a break. Be sensitive. If he or she refuses to directly or indirectly work things out for a month. Make your decision.

6. Lack of sense of mutual responsibility

A sense of responsibility, consciously trying to make things works is a great spearhead for the success of a relationship. A sense of responsibility towards the relationship entails; respect, love and undivided attention. Both partners should have a sense of responsibility in making each other feel loved, valued, respected, notwithstanding sexual satisfaction.

7. Finding perfection

Most young people want a “perfect” partner, whom they want to spend the rest of their lives with. They feel true success in a relationship is by having a perfect partner. They should understand that we are humans and have flaws too. Loving their partner blindfolded to the flaws is what makes it truly successful.

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